Devil on the Right Shoulder – Solution #9

January 3, 2014


I encountered some bad luck.  I lost my job as a bank teller and became a paperboy. I lost my paper route not long after that. No one reads on paper anymore, the Paper Man explained. What now, I said. Get a headhunter, the Paper Man said.  Then he shot himself. I hired a Headhunter. […]

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The Poet Takes Up Stealing Concrete – Solution #222

January 1, 2014


I have been worried about the Poet, because lately she has given up. This all began when she decided to find a lover and for some reason started to court monsters. The last gentleman, a monster that lived at the bottom of our lake, took her left hand which was the hand she used to […]

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How I Lost My Practice Wife – Near Escapes #54

September 24, 2013


I got married last night.  I got really confused and at some point I got married. In the morning, I woke up in our honeymoon suite and found my new wife weeping.  We had only known each other for a day, so I had never seen her cry before. It was awkward. Jill, I said, […]

Things I Tend to Do Since You Left to Plan Spaceship Routes on Jupiter – Solution #9

April 1, 2013


It has been three months since you left to plan spaceship routes on Jupiter. My family is really impressed by you. Its a great opportunity and I’m in full support.  Fortunately and unfortunately, we are in love with each other , and now we are on different planets. So now I am sick and feel […]

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We Maybe Love Cats Now – Problem #32

March 17, 2013


The bad news is that everyone at the office has been infected with Toxoplasma Gondii, which is a parasite that makes all of us feel affectionate towards cats. The good news it we now have twenty-five or thirty cats in the office. They are really cute and they love to play with string. Unfortunately this […]

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A Note Left Concerning My Office – Problem #2

March 14, 2013


To whom it may concern, I leave the light off so that you do not think I am in my office.  Sometimes I nap under my desk. Other times I am just hiding because I really don’t want to talk to you. I suspect you have become suspicious, because you have begun to hang those […]

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An Artistic Rendering of a Specific Feeling – Solution #91

March 12, 2013


Medical Directions: Print out and flip. Take every two hours for rainy days, breakups, or elephant stampedes. In case of an overdose of that terrible specific feeling, take a long nap.

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