Other Legs – Little Rule #389

Posted on March 20, 2012


The man and his girlfriend had been drinking and so he felt the need to let her know that he really loved legs.

I’m in love with legs, he said to his girlfriend. He took a sip of his drink. All legs, he said. But only women mind you. But all legs. Well, shaved legs. Yes. But legs. God, I love them.

She smacked him across the face. What do you mean you love legs, she said.

He rubbed his face. It hurt. But he kept going. I’m in love with them. Almost everything about them. I love how some are long and some are short an-!

He ducked her fist. I’ll kill you, she said.

I love how they carry everything else on top of them. Sometimes I even like the everything else. It’s quite noble if you ask me. Carrying all of that everything else, he said. Hrmmm. And what else do I love about them?

While he was pondering what else he loved about legs she connected with his face. The blow was well placed. She screamed, I’m going to murder you! His glass crashed to the floor. She smashed her own glass against the wall and now she had a shiv. She was in that special place that all lovers eventually find themselves, ready to commit to this one special thing or another.

But I hate feet, he said. I don’t like feet, but I love legs. No, it’s toes. I hate toes. They creep me out, he said.

She lept upon him. The scene at first glance resembled two lovers embracing, but quickly became less heartwarming.