Straight Face – Curse #0878

Posted on October 22, 2011


Many people are born with presentable faces, which is good because the face is where most conversation originates. Unfortunately for me I must concentrate at all times to keep a presentable face. If for a moment I get lazy or lose my train of thought, my face becomes skewed and uneven and falls apart into a disgusting display. I spend a great deal of time practicing in the mirror, tensing facial muscles and scrunching my nose. Anyone who happens to see this exercise feels uneasy and realizes that I am not like everyone else. I am different. I have lost two girlfriends, a couple friends, and even a dentist because they all witnessed my facial shift. After many years of practice I can now concentrate hard enough to look fairly handsome when I need to be. I guess if I ever become a criminal I can use the handsome face for robbery. People don’t mind a handsome robber as much as an ugly one. I will use the hideous face for hiding out. Maybe in a closet or a basement. Attics are too stuffy. Halloween is coming. That is the one time of year I can relax and let my face fall apart and listen to the children scream and let go of concentration without worry.

Posted in: Year 1: Curse