Waiting for the Pink Panther to Get Fat – Curse #297

Posted on October 14, 2011


Ramona has been eating the children in the neighborhood. I know this because I have lost at least six children this month and she has been gaining quite a lot of weight. Ramona has been luring the children by dressing up as the Pink Panther. This is a smooth and calculated strategy. I am impressed by her efficiency, and not completely against her eating the children, but at the same time pissed about the whole situation. Last week the authorities finally shut down my day care. You’ve lost too many children, the authorities said. We can’t have children missing every other day. This whole ordeal is terrible for me. My only real talent is my ability to be child like. Now that I have no day care, I have no job. There aren’t enough unemployment benefits to help me have a solid livelihood. Basically I’m screwed until Ramona finally gets so big that she cannot fit into her Pink Panther furry suit and then maybe I can bounce back with the markets. If she takes up jogging I am going to be angry. I may even have to start eating children as well. I won’t be able to afford food.

Posted in: Year 1: Curse