Comfortable Ways to Keep the Peace – Advice #592

Posted on October 5, 2011

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This one time he decided to stop drinking coffee because his eye lids were twitching and he wanted to be more healthy. This turned him into a gremlin for a while. His wife did not like that her husband was a gremlin. She let him try it out though. He would tear through the food in the pantries and throw utensils around the house. He ripped up the bed linens and peed in the bathtub. Eventually his wife had enough. She tied him to the bed the next morning and gave him an coffee IV. Needless to say he stopped being a gremlin and became her husband again. A month later he suggested that his heart was palpating weirdly. Maybe I should go off coffee, he said. She told him hell no. Why, he said. Is it because of the whole gremlin thing? No, she said. You are just a complete bitch without your coffee. He continued to drink a few pots a day and this was one way they kept the peace.

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Posted in: Year 1: Advice