Finding the Next Big Thing in Processed Food – Advice #233

Posted on August 27, 2011

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We can make them fat, said the chief food producer. But how do we make them sick?

The junior food producer said, stomach sick or anxious sick?

Stomach sick, said the chief food producer. We’ve already got them anxious. Anxious as all hell.

I had no idea, said the junior food producer.

Sure you did, the chief said. What are they thinking about all day? The next candy bar or what they will have for dinner. Why I bet ninety percent of them salivate over something we’re making each and every day.

You should be very  proud, said the junior food producer.

I’ve got it, said the chief. We’re going to make pairs. Things that will make them fat and sick!

Like pickles and cream cheese, said the junior food producer. Or chicken noodle soup and ranch salad dressing!

Exactly, said the chief food producer. He rubbed his belly as he thought up a few excellent pairs, drooling onto his necktie and shirt pocket.

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Posted in: Year 1: Advice