Chastity Belts – Paranoia #996

Posted on August 26, 2011


I wear the same pair of long johns all year. My girlfriend tells me that they are a comfort artifact, like a child who has a teddy bear. She says that I am a big boy now and need to act like one. She says that I have to throw the long johns in the washing machine because they smell terrible and I smell terrible because I am wearing them. Of course I say no. I am a big boy and I can wear what I want, I tell her. The thing is that my girlfriend is clever (and obsessive) so I should shop for some sort of chastity belt or industrial glue that I can use to secure the long johns to my body. I know that one morning I am going to wake up without anything on and at first I will think I maybe got lucky but then I’ll see these long johns in a basket and they will smell so nice and clean and I will feel so exposed and vulnerable. I will hate her face for at least an hour, but she will not mind. She will wear a satisfied smile which in a way is her comfort artifact and one way she tells me to screw myself on a semi regular basis like a lion that roars at her mate.

Posted in: Year 1: Paranoia