Not Under the Sheets – Comfort #322

Posted on July 18, 2011

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Someone has left two feet in her bed again, even though she has hung a sign up that clearly reads “Stay Out, Feet”. The problem isn’t that she finds feet grotesque. She is quite fond of feet and often uses her own. She once had a boyfriend that loved to have his feet rubbed, a pleasure of which she rarely denied him. These feet that have been left in her bed smell just terrible. They are also dirty and need a pedicure. Who do these feet belong to, she wonders. Who would leave their feet in her bed on a Saturday morning? She must be dating some man that sometimes removes his feet, a man whom she has momentarily forgotten about. That is the problem with men though, she thinks. They are easy to forget from time to time, especially the ones that leave their body parts lying around in awkward places. Even though the feet are filthy, part of her wishes they were under the sheets so that the stench would be less offensive.  She puts on latex gloves and removes the feet. Her boyfriend what’s his name can crawl into the bathroom, where his feet will be sitting in a tub of bleach. If he is angry with her, who cares, she thinks. There are so many feet in the world.  Next time she will paint seven of the ten toes a bright red, daring him to say something, anything at all. Maybe at least his name.

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Posted in: Year 1: Comfort