Scratch-Off Tickets – Budget Cuts #5

Posted on July 1, 2011

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Because of the looming budget cuts, everyone was looking for ways to generate revenue for the city. One way to do this was to tax beards. Believe it or not, people loved their beards. This money was projected to generate about a hundred million dollars a year.

One city planner held up his hands and said, wait, wait. Are you sure this figure is accurate?

Turns out the calculation was more complex than simply generating a hundred million dollars from a beard tax. The beard tax would actually generate about a hundred thousand dollars, but all of this money would be invested in scratch-off tickets.

We’re hoping for the best, one councilman said. We’ve taken risks before, and we are comfortable with this one. We’re going to hit the jackpot, Gentlemen!!

A few months later the city also invested in a casino.

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