The Uses of Rope – Advice #449

Posted on June 6, 2011

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While the first instinct for the use of rope is to tie a noose, you must control your excitement and try very hard not to hang yourself. There is no need for such dramatic displays of turmoil. Rope has a variety of other practical uses. These include kidnapping enemies and keeping dogs in the yard. The highest and best use of a rope is when repelling down the side of a building, trying to escape the office without being seen. One should keep a healthy supply of rope nearby for the use of Magic Trick #9, which is a trick that involves disappearing during bad dates. This is not to be confused with Magic Trick #5, which also utilizes rope, but is reserved for only the best of dates.

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Posted in: Year 1: Advice