Roadside Restrooms – Curse #9172

Posted on April 28, 2011


Wake up, says Happy, Papa Bear’s puppet. You passed out again, Happy says.

Papa Bear raises his head from the table. The puppet sits politely on his right paw and he clutches an empty bottle of Maker’s Mark in his left. My, what a head ache I have, says Papa Bear.

You worry me, Happy says. Ever since you stopped hanging out in roadside restrooms, you’ve gone down hill. Ever since the booze and the honey you’ve hit a wall.

It’s just, says Papa Bear, I miss the good ole days. I miss the days of Goldilocks and Baby Bear.

What about Mama Bear, says Happy.

Don’t start, says Papa Bear. And get that stupid grin off your face.

I can’t help it, Happy says. I want to know about Mama Bear. I miss her.

She’s gone, says Papa Bear. Who cares? Let it go.

I wonder who she’s with, says Happy.

I said get that grin off your face, says Papa Bear. Make me a morning tonic, he says.

You think she’s still hanging out with that park ranger, says Happy.

I’m going to strangle you, growls Papa Bear.

You think they’re out cutting wood and watching for forest fires, says Happy.

We need to go to the store, says Papa Bear. We need honey and more booze.

I bet they roast a lot of smores, says Happy.

Shut your mouth, Happy, says Papa Bear.

Happy begins to giggle and only stops when Papa Bear hits him in the head with the empty Maker’s Mark bottle. It’s not FUNNY, says Papa Bear. He keeps hitting Happy, wincing and crying out until Happy’s face is contorted and still. Only then does Papa Bear realize he has killed his only friend. He throws up, partially from the alcohol poisoning but partly from his deed.

I’m sorry, Happy, says Papa Bear. I didn’t mean it. Come back. I don’t care if you grin anymore.  Come back!

Moments pass.

Happy coughs loudly. It’s okay, buddy, says Happy. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. We’re in this together.

Ever since Papa Bear stopped hanging out in roadside restrooms, he has been very blue. Luckily he has Happy to keep him company, a puppet that is made of soft cloth, buttons, and nice thoughts.

Posted in: Bears, Year 1: Curse